10/9/07

BIG THINGS ON THE HORIZON!

For those of you in my inner circle, you are well aware that I have been very busy as of late. For those out you outside said circle, you have been kept unaware by the robot duplicate that has taken my place for the past three months.

As is my wont, I have once again delved deep into the arts mystical. I know, I know, this is not my department's specialty, but why let Ivory have all the fun? After pouring over some musty tomes I've kept lying around I discovered a few mentions of an obscure demon that I'd never heard of before. Long story short, I initiated a global search for several important relics (a few of which now adorn my trophy shelf) and aligned them under a full moon.

As I chanted the mystic rites I noticed something different about this summoning. There wasen't the usual smell of sulpher, or the feeling of static electricity in the air. Instead I got the sudden feeling that there was some sale that I was missing three counties over. An odd feeling to be sure, but it was only about to get stranger.

The demon appeard from the Eather, looking like a cross between an iguana, a North American spotted grasshopper, and Calvin Coolidge. He greeted me and offered to grant me my deepest desire. Now, if you have been in AWD for any length of time, you can guess what my deepest desire is, but OverLord Blue is no demon's fool. I knew there had to be a catch.

So, I asked the Demon what he expected in return. To my horror, he did not ask for my soul, or even the soul of one of my subordinates. Instead he demanded that I simply answer a question.

I can honestly say, agents and operatives, that this was the first and only time I have regreted my lack of knowledge of Love Boat...

Vincere Causa Anima Et Lucri