You may or may not recall a certain initiative, pushed through by Overlady Ivory several month ago, to begin research on drugs that would slow or reverse the aging process. Those efforts have at last shown signs of progress. Special agents covertly slipped the experimental 45-b-2dr compound into the mashed potatoes of one Elsie McLean.
As I'm sure some of you know, this 102 year old is now the oldest person to score a Hole-in-One. Can your mind handle the sheer breakthrough this event means for our organization!? A HIO is incredibly difficult for anyone to score, at any age. Our scientist have given someone over a century old the coordination, power and form necessary to score this most difficult of shots.
Work is now continuing, look for special food supplements within the week. They are going to be small white pills, and are definitely not aspirin.
Vincere Causa Anima Et Lucri
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